Missing him more then ever.

By locobaby28 on Sat, 02-04-12, 20:28

Posted in Group:

Grief

I hate my life. So much, and there was one person in it that I knew I go to at all times no matter what. We were closer then anyone and I was more like him then anyone else. We were both drummers and guitarists, we both could use our right and left hands, we both had the same sicknesses, we were both trouble makers, both different from everyone in our school, and we both had the same interests.
He was my brother and he left me.
He was an alcoholic and had an enlarged heart, he made me happy when I was always sad. Eric died a few months ago and I never talked to anyone about how I felt. I'm a big ball of sadness and the only person I can talk to about it can't respond to me and never will. No one understands why I'm a bitch and mean but I'm afraid. Afraid that if I'm any other way I'll cry, I'll just let it all out and that scares me because no one but Eric has seen me like that.
This is making my life fall apart.
I just don't know what to do anymore.

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By Lostfornow on Sat, 02-04-12, 21:05

locobaby28 --I am truely sorry for your loss. Maybe if you let it out and grief for your los you will begin to feel better. Also, being mean and a bitch won't help bring him back to you. I hope you find someone else that can uderstand you and be there for you.
I will be here if you need to talk, perhaps a therapist can give you some good insight.

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By PatriciaB on Mon, 02-06-12, 15:47

I know how you feel, locobaby28. I lost my sister last year, and have not felt the same since. Every day is a struggle. But you can't give up. I know that my sister would not want me to hate myself, even though I want to. Reach out to others around you! It might be the most difficult thing you do, but it will also be the most important. If you're interested, there's also some great advice on http://onlineceucredit.com/edu/social-work-ceus-dl. Hope it might help you the way it's helped me. I'll be keeping you in my thoughts.

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