not any better

By jenniferh12 on Wed, 02-22-12, 09:39

Posted in Group:

Grief

Its been almost 2 weeks since my aunt passed. I am trying to feel better but I cant. My husband is trying to help but he doesn't know what to do. Everyday I keep hoping this was all a horrible nightmare. All I keep seeing is her slowly dying in front of us. I hear the "rattle" she did after the vent was removed. I smell the mixture of death and hospital. I have to come to my aunt's house everyday to take care of my grandmother now. I literally feel sick when I get here. I cant really tell anyone how I am doing because everyone is grieving too. I am sick of hearing she is in a better place. I don't know how to help myself. I cant get the last three weeks of her life out of my head. I wish I could. I am so sad. I have never felt this sad before.

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By stillme on Wed, 02-22-12, 11:08

Im sorry to hear about your loss *hugs You are grieving my friend.. give yourself some time, Be nice to you and know what you are feeling is normal... painful, but normal. Grieving is a process and it takes time... time to heal

Some things i did to help me get through the death of my husband were...

be nice to yourself... take time to be good to you ( a nice walk in your favorite place, read a book, take a bubble bath,..)
write... i wrote letters to him almost every day for months after he passed. It helped me to say things i still needed to say to him...
reach out... as you have done here, and let others support you for awhile..
spend time with friends and family... laugh.. i know that sounds funny, but hearing laughter really is good for the soul..
put together a picture album of your favorites of you and your aunt...
plant a flower or tree in your yard in her honor...
These are just a few things i did to get through that first few months and they really helped me alot...

Im glad you are here and keep talking! Laugh, cry, rant, rave... we are here for you and understand!!

I pray you find peace within

Dont give up before the miracle happens!

Tawnye

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By jenniferh12 on Wed, 02-22-12, 14:26

Thank you for your kind words. I just miss her so much. Everything feels so different. I just cant stop thinking about it. It tears my heart every second of the day. It will be two weeks tomorrow...its been over a month since I heard her voice. I am angry and sad..what makes it worse is that it was partly the hospitals fault. So she didn't have to die...

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